WCW Uncensored 2000
Taking a break from my regularly themed PPV reviews this time to cover something different. I have a list of several PPV's I want to cover, adding more anytime something comes to mind, and by the spin of a wheel, this PPV was chosen, from the dying days WCW. At this point, WCW hasn't had it's Russo/Bischoff reboot, which I plan on covering from start to finish at some point, so for now, let's get into this.
Our opening video package starts with Luger and Elizabeth breaking the arms of Sting, Shane Douglas and others, leading to Sting making the challenge for tonight's PPV. Then Ric and Hogan hitting each other with straps. Then Jarrett hitting Sid with guitars.
Camera cuts to the back where Luger, Ric and Elizabeth are arriving at the arena. Luger talks about redemption and the strap match, about all I caught. Then we cut to Hogan and Sid talking in the back, Hogan tells him to watch himself. Sid tells him not to worry about him. Then we cut to Jarrett and the Harris Brothers, asking if Jeff's got an insurance policy. Jeff says he's got a lot of surprises tonight. Then we cut to outside the arena where a limo pulls up, then to the arena.
We're live from the American Airlines Arena in Miami, Florida amidst Spring Break. Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay and Mark Madden and we waste no time getting to our first match.
WCW Cruiserweight Championship: The Artist (FKA Prince Iaukea) (w/ Paisley) (c) vs Psychosis (w/ Juventud Guererra)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: Glitter rains from the ceiling as The Artist, formerly Prince Iaukea makes his way out. We see footage where from prior Nitro, where Prince cost Psychosis a match with Kaz Hiyashi, and another attack on Thunder this week. Paisley of course, better known as Sharmell.
Before the action gets underway, music plays and out comes Chris Candido, who I guess is making his debut here on Nitro, deciding to join commentary.
Psychosis gets the advantage at first until Prince gets a right hand in, hanging hi up in the corner and hits a running knee to the ribs, followed by a snapmare and a cover, but Psycho kicks out. Psycho sent off the ropes into a side kick, Prince with the cover and a near fal, then tosses Psycho out. Prince argues with Juvey while Paisley walks over and slaps Psycho, and another. Psycho sent off the steps before being rolled back in. Shoulders tot he midsection in the corner, Psycho whipped to the opposite and Prince nails a clothesline.
Prince with another snapmare and pulls the hair, slamming Psycho into the mat, followed by a leg drop, series of covers but Pscyho kicks out. Psycho sent off the ropes but he rolls over for a sunset flip but Prince kicks out, then a clothesline sending Psycho back down. Prince sent to the corner, running elbow by Psycho, hoisting Prince up to the top rope and nails a Frankensteiner, makes the cover but Prince kicks out.
Psycho sent off the ropes but catches Prince into a front suplex, then he goes up top but Paisley makes a distraction. Juvey kisses her and they start fighting, while Psycho nails a leg drop from the top. He goes for a pin but Paisley argues with her, while Prince goes to the second rope and nails his jumping DDT to retain the championship in 7:22. Not a bad opener for the show. Candido wasn't terrible on commentary, a bit annoying at times, but it was better than listening to Madden.
Juvey taunts Paisley while Prince rests in the corner with his title, and we go to replays.
We go to the back where Gene is with Bigelow, who's set to face The Wall tonight. Bigelow brought Wall into the business, but he's made Bigelow sick by attacking and crippling people. Simple teacher vs student story here. Not a bad promo.
XS (Lenny Lane & Lodi) vs The Screamin' Demons ("Screamin'" Norman Smiley & The Kiss Demon)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: We see footage from a couple weeks ago where XS attacked Norman, to be saved by the Demon. Then on Thunder, Norman returned the favor. XS the former West Hollywood Blonds, and the former Standards and Practices. Miss Hancock makes her way out, XS's former manager and takes a seat with commentary. Mark hits on her while one of XS says they're kicking her to the curb for the last time. The other one says she's not even close to being "rizat" material, whatever that is. Hancock says they obviously need female companionship, suggesting they have small dicks. Norman comes out of Demon's crypt thing dressed like Demon. Tony and Mark swoon over Hancock while Tenay holds it together. Lane and Lenny attack Demon and Norman to get things started.
Lane sends Demon off the ropes who catches him with a double underhook suplex, as their partners go to the outside. Demon with the cover but Lodi breaks it up, then XS send Demon to the outside. Norman comes in from behind and knocks Lane to the outside, then a headbutt to Lodi as Lane goes after Demon. Demon sent face first off the announce table as Norman humps Lodi's ass into the corner, Lodi off the ropes into a wheelbarrow from Norman, some spanks before throwing Lodi onto his ass.
Lodi off the ropes as he gets up into a scoop slam. Lane from behind, XS send Norman off the ropes who kicks Lane in the midsection, dropping him with a clothesline, slipping between Lodi's legs to tag in Demon. Right hands on Demon, Lodi with a drop toe hold as Demon tries to send him off the ropes and Lane tags in, leg drop to the back of the neck. I think a tag happens, but the camera is on Hancock while it happens. Back in the ring, Demon is whipped into the corner, Lodi leaps off of Lane into Demon and Lodi flies over the ropes to the floor. Lane with a suplex, hooks the leg but Demon kicks out.
Lodi tags in, they send Demon off the ropes and go for a double clothesline but they all go down for... reasons. Demon get the hot tag, Norman gets the advantage momentarily only to get pushed over Lane, allowing Lodi to hit a full nelson facebuster. He goes for the pin but Demon breaks it up. Demon goes after Lodi but Lane cuts him off, Lodi sends himself and Demon over the ropes. Norman sneaks up behind Lane and locks in the Norman Conquest (crossface chickenwing) and Lane taps out in 3:41. It was obvious they tried to get in as much stuff as they could in the little time they had, and it was just bland and dull.
XS go after Hancock, blaming her for the loss and take her away. Demon and Norman stop them up the aisle way and take Hancock back to the ring, Norman does his big wiggle and she spanks him, then the ref gets into it, before we go to the back.
Kidman, Booker and Torrie Wilson are backstage, Kidman apologizing for what happened on Thunder, that the stuff Stevie was saying may have got to him. Booker says to save his apology for when they're out there in the ring, and that if he's gonna be there, he needs Kidman there watching his back.
Cut to David Flair, Crowbar and Daffney somewhere else in the back, David and Crowbar wearing neck braces. David asks Daffney to stay in the back seeing as tonight's match is gonna be dangerous, and she promises she will, before they head off.
Back to the arena, commentary talk up The Wall as we go to footage of his destruction, being responsible for Crowbar and David's injuries, chokeslaming everyone through tables. Bigelow had to step in and that's how we got here.
Bam Bam Bigelow vs The Wall
Bigelow wastes not time with right hands as Wall enters the ring, more in the corner, Wall with some of his own, then kicks to the midsection. Bigelow with more rights, whipping Wall into the corner and nailing a splash, then goes to whip again, only to be pulled back into a clothesline. Wall with a clothesline as Bigelow slouches in the corner, then goes for another, but Bigelow nails a clothesline of his own.
Bigelow hits a scoop slam before going up top, nailing a headbutt, covers Wall but he kicks out. Bigelow seemingly goes for Greetings from Ashbury Park but Wall slips out, sending Bigelow off the ropes into a big boot. More right hands by Wall, Bigelow sent off the ropes and catches a high knee. Wall hooks the leg for a near fall.
Bigelow sent off the ropes again but Bigelow catches him with a spinning DDT, goes for the cover but Wall kicks out. Wall rakes the eyes with more right hands, before sending himself and Bigelow over the ropes. They fight their way up the aisle, sending each other into the guardrails before going beside the staging with an equipment table. Wall chokeslams Bigelow through the table, setting off smoke from the equipment and... the bell is rung? It's not even by countout, the ref followed them the whole way, so is it a DQ? Wikipedia lists this as a win for Bigelow by DQ, which seems to be on par with WCW's assbackward booking. Anyway, the match went for 3:35.
David Flair attacks Wall from behind followed by Crowbar, but Wall makes short work of them. EMT's are out with a stretcher for Bigelow as Wall and Crowbar are on the stage. They fight to the back I guess? Crowbar has climbed up the entrance set where there's a platform, but Wall catches Crowbar by the throat, right hands and chokeslams Crowbar through the stage below. Doctors now rush to Crowbar as Daffney screams nearby. I think the fans start chanting to jump as we go to replays. Commentary suggest Crowbar might be dead as we see Crowbar carted out, with several wrestlers by his side.
We cut to Gene who's with Brian Knobbs, who says Crowbar and Bigelow are two of the gutsiest guys he's ever seen. He's dedicating his Hardcore Title match to them before walking off.
WCW Hardcore Championship: 3 Count (Evan Karagias, Shannon Moore & Shane Helms) (c) vs Brian Knobbs
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: So I guess 3 Count are all the Hardcore Champions, after they piled on top of Knobbs to win the title a month ago. Evan thanks their fans for supporting the best looking Hardcore Champs in history. He says 3 Count's gonna be live at 5 all night in South Beach, and Knobbs interrupts before anything else goes on. Shane wearing a masquerade looking mask, Madden remarks it's to protect his broken nose. Commentary mention that this is a Gauntlet Match while Tony says it's hard to sit through this after what Wall just did. Knobbs runs backstage to pull out a wheelbarrow full of weapons, including a ladder and a trash can. He tosses some of them into the ring, Shane comes off the top with a mop and cracks Knobbs over the back with it to start this match.
Evan and Moore off the apron with trash can lids to the head, followed by a trash can shot before they re-enter the ring. Knobbs cracks Moore over the head with a trash can, then Evan, then a chair across the back of Shane. Evan gets him across the back with a mop, but he shrugs it off, tossing a trash can at him, then another across the back of Moore, then Shane, then the head of Evan. Knobbs shoves Moore's face into his armpit, then Evan, then Shane. Shane cracks a chair over Knobbs' head. Moore sets a ladder in the corner, Shane and Evan whip Knobbs face first into it. Moore sets the ladder up and Shane climbs up and nails a splash, then Evan climbs and hits a twisting splash, then Moore with a senton, but Knobbs rolls out of the way. Evan with a trash can to the back, but Knobbs grabs a fire extinguisher and sprays all three as they pose for the crowd.
Knobbs breaks a mop over Shane's back, sets a chair over his face and cracks a mop over it, Knobbs makes the cover and eliminates Shane. Knobbs breaks a mop over Evan's back, then whips Moore into the guard rail on the outside. Knobbs pulls out a table and sets it up before throwing Evan back in the ring. Broom to the back, then Knobbs powerbombs Evan over the ropes through the table. Knobbs makes the cover and eliminates him. Shane back now but gets whipped over the guardrail. Moore tries to get a chair shot in but Knobbs blocks and gets him in the head.
Moore rolled back in as Knobbs pulls out another table and into the ring. He slams the ladder on top of Moore before setting up the table and scoops Moore up, but Shane with a dropkick off the top rope, sending them tumbling over the table, Shannon covers and wins to retain...
Nope, Knobbs' foot was on the ropes, despite the fact this is a Hardcore Match, so the match continues. 3 Count celebrate prematurely as Knobbs grabs a trash can from behind, nailing the in the heads. Knobbs throws a ladder out onto Evan and Moore tries to just hand Knobbs the title, but Knobbs isn't having any of it. Knobbs goes up top with a trash can and nails a splash with the can underneath him, pins Moore and regains the title in 7:01. Well, this was a mess.
Knobbs leaves he ring as we go to replays, before cutting to Gene with the New Harlem Heat: Big T (formerly Ahmed Johnson), Stevie Ray and Kash, managed by J. Biggs. Ray says its about time they got the two pipsqueaks, Booker and Kidman, in the ring, and they're gonna make short order of them. He tells Kidman not to trust Booker. Big T says he doesn't have much to say, but tells Booker and Kidman that the heat is on.
Cut back to the limo we saw at the start of the show, no one has come out according to Tony. Then we cut o Vampiro somewhere in the back, who says he sees things every day that horrifies him, and when he sees bad things and bad people, it makes him think of things, and he gets ashamed, because he starts to think of really bad things and doing violent mean things. He talks about how Fit Finlay got in his face, saying he's got no respect or responsibility, and how he has to keep pushing buttons. He says he doesn't want to be a bad person. This is just a weird, rambling promo.
Booker & Billy Kidman (w/ Torrie Wilson) vs New Harlem Heat 2000 (Big T & Stevie Ray) (w/ J. Biggs & Cash)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: So, Booker has lost the T and his usual music because it belongs to Harlem Heat, so his music is more generic and he's just...well, Booker now. We still have no update on Bigelow, as we see footage from last week's Thunder, where Booker gets pissed at Kidman for not having his back. Later in the night, Booker would save Kidman from an attack by Dustin Rhodes. Harlem Heat of course come out to the classic music. Biggs joins commentary, who Madden claims to have grown up with.
Ray and Booker start things out, Ray right out of the gate with some right hands and kicks, knocking Booker to the mat, stomping away at him. Ray goes to send Booker off the ropes, but pulls back and nails a side kick. Booker with right hands now, Ray sent off the ropes into an elbow. Kidman tagged in, Ray sent off the ropes, Booker drops for Kidman to nail a dropkick.
Kidman sent off the ropes and tries a crossbody but Ray catches him and hits a powerslam, before tagging T in. Kidman takes him off his feet with a dropkick before tagging Booker in, tying T up in the ropes for a chop, sent off the ropes and ducks a clothesline for a side kick, then one for Ray as he tries to step in. Cash tries to enter but Booker nails the scissors kick through the ropes. Booker with a Russian leg sweep on T before tagging in Kidman who goes up top, but Ray hits a clothesline.
Ray with a right hand knocking Kidman to the mat and tags T back in, Kidman sent off the ropes into a pair of bicycle kicks. Ray back in, Kidman off the ropes again to a double gut punch and a pair of side kicks. Ray with the cover, but Torrie gets on the apron. Cash chokes and attacks Kidman while the ref deals with Torrie. Kidman brought to the outside, T climbs over the guardrail and flies over, for what's supposed to be a shoulder tackle but doesn't even hit him. Kidman tossed back in and Ray drops Kidman ribs first over the top rope, followed with another kick off the apron.
Cash rolls him back in and T is in now, camera cuts to Biggs and Madden, then cut back to a spinebuster on Kidman, T with the cover but Booker breaks it up. Ray in now, whipped into the corner into a clothesline, then the opposite corner, Ray goes for a splash but Kidman dodges, and a bulldog. Ray tags out and Kidman gets the hot tag, Booker with right hands, sent off the ropes and nails T with a Book End, cover but Ray breaks it up. Booker sent off the ropes and hits a Book End on Ray. T comes from behind, Booker sent off the ropes, ducks some clothesline but they catch him into a double spinebuster. T goes for the pin but Kidman flies in to break it up.
Ray tosses him out of the ring and follows, T stomping away at Booker. Kidamn knocks Cash into Ray. T goes for a suplex but Kidman hops over the ropes into a sunset flip, but can't pull T down for the pin. Booker nails the Harlem Side Kick to complete the pin and win the match in 6:59. Honestly not a bad match. A bit of a mess at points, but not bad.
Booker, Kidman and Torrie celebrate at ringside as Biggs and Ray argue with the ref, then go to replays. Then we go back to what happened to Bigelow and Crowbar earlier in the night, into our next match.
We get a short video package where Fit Finlay and Vampiro fight in various areas, Finlay making the challenge.
Falls Count Anywhere Match: Fit Finlay vs Vampiro
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: As Finlay makes his way out, we get an update on Crowbar and Bigelow, both suffering from severe concussions. Bigelow also has a dislocated shoulder, and Crowbar cracked several ribs and a severely bruised hip. Finlay rocking gray camo, both with casts on one of their hands.
Finlay wastes no time with a knee to the midsection, point of the elbow to the head and a clothesline. Kick to the back and an elbow drop, before a nerve pinch and raking at Vamp's face, then another elbow. Vamp sent off the ropes but Vamp nails a spinning heel kick. Vamp up top with another heel kick, cover and a 2 count.
Finlay's vest opened to allow Vamp a chop, headbutts and kicks against the ropes and clubs to the back. Finlay in the corner as Vamp lands right hands, Finlay whipped into the opposite corner as Vamp goes charging, but Finlay gets the boots up, sending Vamp face first into the turnbuckle, followed by a rolling senton.
Finlay heads out and grabs a chair, placing it on Vamp's face and throat but... the ref takes it away? Um, OK...? Finlay gets pissed and takes it back but Vamp kicks it back in his face, before tossing him out.
Vamp sends Finlay face first off the announce table before jamming his elbow in Finlay's face. Finlay hoists Vamp up and drop throat first on the guard rail. Now over by the aisle, Finlay gets whipped into the rail, Vamp charges but gets launched over to the floor. Through the crowd and up the steps, fighting their way through the crowd, slamming each other around until they find themselves to the men's room.
Vamp thrown into a stall, then the door is slammed into his neck and head, before dragging into another stall. Vamp throws a trash can into Finlay before climbing the top of the stall, launching off only for Finlay throw the trash can back into him, then again. Out of the bathroom now with a metal can off Vamp's head, in what looks to be a bar crowded with people. Cast off the head of Finlay as they fight out to the balcony.
Finlay with Vamp on his shoulders, seemingly to throw him off, but Vamp slips off, only to head back inside. Vamp thrown into a pillar , then right hands on Finlay but Vamp gets whipped into a wall, then into a back body drop to the floor. Finlay misses a punch and hits the pillar, then thrown into the pillar, and a fan topples over him. Vamp hits the Nail in the Coffin (Michinoku Driver) on the floor to win in 8:46. This started slow and just turned into a mess. Last few minutes could barely see anything, no lights, all the fans crowding. Could've been a fun match, but this is WCW so...
Vamp pulls himself up as the fans celebrate and he makes his escape and back out to the arena to celebrate among the fans.
Cut to backstage where the Harris Brothers are talking to Jarrett ahead of their title match, which is next. Then, to Gene who are with the tag champs, the Mamalukes: Big Vito, Johnny the Bull and... Disco Inferno? Gene mentions some unique stips before Disco interrupts, calling the Harris' jamokes and that they've treated the Mamalukes with no respect, so they'll have to beat it out of the Harris' tonight. Vito cuts in, mentions family values, no holds barred, no DQ, they're they champs they like having the gold around their waists, and that's how they're going home. Johnny says they're gonna break their thumbs before we go back to the arena.
No Disqualification Match for the WCW World Tag Team Championship: The Harris Brothers (Ron & Don) vs The Mamalukes (Big Vito & Johnny the Bull) (c) (w/ Disco Inferno)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: Harris Brothers come out to NWO music and in suits.
Vito and... one of the Harris' start out, as Disco joins commentary. Do we really need a guest commentator for every match? Harris gets Vito in the corner with rights, Vito fights out and off the ropes with a series of clotheslines, knocking the Harris out. Johnny tagged in and the Harris with some rights now, choking Johnny over the middle rope. Harris sent off the ropes and caught in a powerslam, Johnny with the cover but Harris kicks out.
Vito tagged in, Harris sent off the ropes, kick to the midsection, boot from Johnny off the ropes and Vito follows with a swinging neck breaker. Vito with the cover and a near fall. Harris with a low blow before tagging in the other Harris, and commentary spend more time arguing with Disco and Madden than telling us which Harris is which. Vito sent off the ropes into an elbow. Johnny pushed and goes after Harris only to be held back, going back onto the apron. Vito reverses a whip into the ropes and catches Harris with a hip toss, then a scoop slam, stomps and tags in Johnny.
Harris sent off the ropes and knocked down, Mamalukes stomp away, send Harris off the ropes again into a Brooklyn Bomb, just invented by Disco apparently, Johnny hooks the legs but Harris kicks out. Harris reverses a whip into the ropes and Harris #2 clubs Johnny from behind on the apron, Harris followed with a clothesline. Harris tags out and stomps away at Johnny before tossing him out. Vito goes after Harris while Harris #2 sends Johnny into the guardrail, then rolls him back in the ring. Johnny sent off the ropes and caught in a sidewalk slam, makes the cover ut Vito breaks it up.
Harris tags out and #2 kicks Johnny in the midsection. Johnny off the ropes with a spin kick. Harris shoves Vito off the ropes, who then slides in while the Harris' double team Johnny in the corner. Harris #2 hangs Johnny over the top rope, Harris steps on his head. Johnny tries to fight back but gets sent face first into the turnbuckle. Camera spends several moments on Disco before Harris whips Johnny off the ropes, ducks a clothesline and take each other down.
Johnny with the hot tag and he delivers some right hands and kicks, Johnny joins in while Vito gets a 10 punch in the corner, followed by a suplex. Vito goes up top and nails an elbow, hooks the leg but Harris kicks out. Johnny in and sends Harris off the ropes, into something like a Hart Attack, Johnny goes for the pin but Harris #2 breaks it up. Harris #2 tosses Vito out, Johnny sent off the ropes into a double flapjack, pin but Johnny kicks out. Johnny sent off the ropes again, into a pancake for a pin but Vito breaks it up.
Johnny and a Harris go to the outside as Vito goes for a sunset flip, but Harriis fights back with right hands. Disco runs in with one of the belts and nails Harris with it. Vito hooks the leg but Harris kicks out.
Harris #2 back in now, Vito goes for an Impaler DDT but gets clocked with the belt, then one for Disco and Johnny as they try to help. Vito off the ropes and caught for an H Bomb to win the titles in 8:47. Eh. Harris Brothers are pretty limited, so this wasn't all that great a match. Not to mention Disco started to get annoying.
Harris' celebrate and leave the ring as we go to replays, then we see the limo parked outside again.
We cut to Finlay in the back who's requested interview time. He says that he said all along he'd beat respect into Vamp, and that's what he did tonight. He admits the better man won, he took it to him, and lit a fire within Vamp. He tells Vamp to keep it burning and has earned his respect and that's all he's got to say. Short and simple.
Then to Gene, who's with Lex Luger, Ric Flair and Elizabeth. Lex hypes his match with Sting, calling him a coward, saying he'll beat Sting's brains in and knock some teeth down his throat, because he can do it, because he's the Total Package. Ric hypes up Lex and says Sting's going down, before going to Hogan, saying he's gonna bleed and sweat all night long.
Then a video package for our next match. Dustin has beat up Funk multiple times over the weeks, I guess continuing the Funk/Rhodes history.
Then we go to Gene again who's with Dustin, bullrope around his neck, and says tonight is Funk's retirement match (ha!). He says Funk won't get to watch, but he will let Funk watch Dustin beat the living hell out of him and split his head open with the cowbell, and make Funk admit that Dustin is the American Nightmare.
Texas Bullrope Match: Terry Funk vs Dustin Rhodes
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: Funk comes out with a chicken and mic and hand, calling Dustin a chicken. He says the only difference between Dustin and Dusty is that Dusty is much fatter, plus he has a surprise for Dustin, and out comes a man in a chicken suit from the crowd into the ring. Dustin chases the chicken man up the aisle and Terry lays out Dustin to... start the match? They haven't been tied together by the bullrope yet.
Lefts and rights by Terry before whipping Dustin into the guard rail, then goes to the ring. More left by Terry before he starts to whip Dustin with the bullrope. Oh, I guess it isn't THAT type of bull rope match. Terry takes Dustin to the corner for the weakest 10 punch I've ever seen, followed by a DDT. Terry goes for the cover but Dustin kicks out.
More lefts by Terry before sending Dustin face first into the turnbuckle, Dustin sent off the ropes into a clothesline. Terry with the cowbell now and nails Dustin, covers but Dustin grabs the bottom rope. Dustin with a low blow from behind as Terry argues with the referee, probably because there shouldn't be a rope break in this match. Dustin now with a right hand before sending Terry face first into the corner, then wraps the bullrope around him, throwing him to the middle and pulling back for a whiplash. Now cowbell shots to the head and face as Terry hangs on between the ropes before dropping to the outside.
Dustin follows out and wraps the rope around Terry again for another whiplash, followed by some right hands. Back in the ring, Dustin hooks the bullrope to Terry's wrist, then his own. Oh so it is that kind of bull rope match? DDT by Dustin, cover and a kick out. Dustin lifts for a back body drop only to throw Terry forward onto his back, another cover and another kick out.
Dustin with rights in the corner, positions the cowbell under Terry's face as he hooks his head, delivering a bulldog out of the corner onto the cowbell. Dustin with another cover but Terry kicks out. Dustin with more right hands but the chicken is back out, only for Dustin to nail him with the rope and bell, sending him out of the ring. Dustin sends the chicken into the guard rail before Dustin nails Terry with the bell again. Dustin goes to climb back in over the ropes but Terry crotches him and makes him ride the rope.
Both back in now, Terry with a low blow using the cowbell, then stomping away at his head. Terry gets a mic from ringside and changes the rules to an I Quit match. The ref tries to tell him otherwise, but Funk nails him in the head with the cowbell instead, then throws him out of the ring. Funk nails Dustin with the bell now repeatedly and tells Dustin to quit as he does, and eventually he does say I Quit, but the match is still officially a Bullrope Match, so the match continues.
Funk argues with the ref again and Funk threatens him, but Dustin nails him with the cowbell again off the distraction, then a few more times for good measure. Dustin nails a piledriver onto the cowbell to get the win in 9:03. This wasn't a great match, slow and plodding. Not to mention I think Funk is supposed to be the face in this, and yet he acted more like a heel. Finish was a bit over booked too.
Dustin gets the mic again and says he;s gonna send Funk back to Texas in a box, before he starts nailing him with the cowbell some more. Funk fights back with some rights and Dustin is forced to retreat as Funk swings the rope around.
They decided to plug some Outsiders T-shirts for some reason before going to Gene in the back, who's with Sid ahead of his title defense tonight. Gene says he's concerned about what Jarrett might have in store tonight. Sid says it's not his first time dealing with Jeff, saying he's not gonna let it bother him, he's going to go on to bigger and better things. He finishes saying he's gotta watch his own back before walking off. I think I missed parts but he speaks in this quieted tone it's hard to tell what he's saying.
Gene sends us to a video package of the history between Luger and Sting, from Luger breaking Sting's arm in a chair with the help of Liz, mocking Sting in his facepaint and wig, then Luger breaking more arms. Sting returns to to take out Luger and Ric, Sting challenging Luger for tonight.
Lumberjack Cast Match: Sting vs Lex Luger (w/ Elizabeth) (Lumberjacks: Jimmy Hart, Curt Henning, Doug Dillinger, Fit Finlay, Brian Knobbs, Vampiro)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: The lumberjacks tonight are the victims of Luger, all sporting a cast on their arm. I guess Luger is going by The Total Package at this point. After posing for a bit, Luger gets on the mic and says that's why he's the Total Package. He says he wants to diffuse the situation before the match starts, apologizing to the lumberjacks for what he did. He says he's also the most intelligent wrestler, and brings out some backup lumberjacks, adding Hugh Morris, Harlem Heat 2000 and The Harris Brothers, all sporting their own casts.
Luger wastes no time attacking Sting before he can get his jacket off as the bell is rung, Sting face first into the turnbuckle, then Luger, Sting with kicks to the midsection and a right to knock Lex to the mat. Lex rolls out to his lumberjack before he rolls back in, Sting stomps away. Sting with an atomic drop then some right hands, more stomps as Lex tries to roll out. Crowd is finally into the show after being dead, Sting hits a scoop slam then an elbow, cover and a near fall.
Bell clap on Luger before he gets tossed out to Sting's lumberjacks who... stomp on him rather than use the casts. Then Luger's lumberjacks get involved and roll him back in. Sting back on the offensive with right hands. Luger begging for mercy and suckers Sting in, pulling him out through the ropes toward his lumberjacks, who do the smart thing and nail Sting with their casts before tossing him back in the ring.
Tank Abbott decides to walk to the ring now sans cast and he knocks Doug to the floor, then... leaves. Um, OK. Lumberjack starts to fight up the aisle and to the back as Luger applies a headlock. Why? Oh wait, Vampiro's still here. Now Flair is out with Elizabeth, chair in hand, and he and Vamp fight it out. Sting now with clotheslines and a bulldog as Flair sends Vamp into the guard rail. Flair in now with chops in the corner, Sting fights back and sends Rick into the opposite corner for a Stinger Splash, then a hip toss and a dropkick before Luger attacks from behind.
Sting reverses a whip into the corner and nails a Stinger Splash on Luger, but while the ref argues with Flair, Liz nails Sting in the back with a bat from the apron. Vamp takes the bat as Jimmy Hart takes her to the back, with Hulk's belt in his hand for some reason. Luger goes for the cover but Sting kicks out. Luger gets Sting up for the Torture Rack, but Vamp comes in and nails Luger for behind, allowing Sting to nail the Scorpion Deathdrop for the win in 7:01. Honestly if you take the unnecessary lumberjacks out of this, this isn't a bad match. Didn't go too long, wasn't too short. I'll give this one a pass.
Sting poses in the corner and embrace with Vamp, the brothers in paint as Tenay remarks. We go to the back where Gene is with Tank, who asks about his involvement in the match. Tank says he did it because he can, and I think calls Gene "Gino" in the process. Then says something about Doug taking his money. I don't know, I didn't understand this one bit.
We go to a video package for our world title match, showing Jarrett smashing guitars over Sid's head and getting two victories over him in the weeks leading up. Jeff has gotten the upper hand more often than not.
We see the limo again outside and the driver opens the door, only for the feed to cut to Jarrett on his way to the ring. Tenay mentions a change to the format, as Hogan/Flair was supposed to be next. A crew member is seen telling Sid his match is next in his locker room and he rushes out. We go back to the arena and to Michael Buffer for the introductions.
WCW World Heavyweight Championship: Sid Vicious (c) vs Jeff Jarrett (WCW United States Heavyweight Champion)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: Probably sign of the night right here.
Jeff comes down accompanied by 3 ladies, gets a mic and says the time has come for the Chosen One to realize his destiny. He said he was going to make Sid's life a living hell the last 2 months, and he's done that. He said he was gonna knock down any roadblock WCW put in front of him, and he's done that. Tonight, he's proclaiming once again that he's gonna stroll down the aisle as US Heavyweight champ, and stroll back down the new WCW World Champion. He says WCW has tried to screw him time and time again, but tonight he's got one up his sleeve. He asks the fans if they want to see some skin, and of course they do, but Jeff won't let the girls do it until he brings home the gold. This crowd is loving them some Sid.
Jeff tries for a right hand right away but Sid ducks and lands some of his own, sending Jarrett off the ropes and a clothesline. Jeff in the corner for some punches to the midsection, sent to the opposite corner but catches himself, only for Sid to land another right hand. Sid with a 10 punch, Jarret sent off the ropes and caught for a chokeslam but Jeff pokes Sid in the eye, only to be clotheslined over the ropes to the floor.
Sid follows and scoop slams Jeff onto the announce table before pouring water on Jeff, then follows with a double axe handle off the table. Sid throws Jeff over the barricade and they fight through the crowd, Jeff taking all the offense. Tony is confused because as to why there's no count out right now, even though it's Uncensored as he'd remark. They eventually fight to the entrance and Sid whips Jeff into the guard rail, starts to choke him but the Harris Brothers attack from behind.
Back in the ring they double team with right hands, and Jarrett is seen grabbing a chair, only for the referee to try and take it, only for Jeff to swing him around and throw him. Harris' leave after laying into Sid, Jeff re-enters and poses in the corner before stomping away at Sid. Right hands whaling away at Sid, Sid sent off the ropes and Jeff swings onto his back to apply a sleeper hold. Sid tries to fight out but eventually drops to his knees and goes limp, ref raises his arm twice, but Sid comes back to life on the third. Sid pulls himself back and elbows out of the hold, but Jeff thumbs to the eye.
Sid reverses a whip into the corner and charges, but Jeff gets a boot up, off the second rope with a double axe handle, but Sid nails a low blow. Jeff comes off the ropes but gets caught with a right from Sid, tries again and gets caught again. Sid sends Jeff off the ropes into a big boot. Sid argues with a Harris Brother only for Jeff to attack from behind. The other Harris climbs onto the apron with belt in hand as Jeff tries to send Sid face first into it, only to get reversed. Jeff hits the title, Sid hooks the legs but Jeff kicks out.
Jeff sent off the ropes and caught for a chokeslam, but low blows Sid as he's lifted up. Jeff nails the ref with an elbow inadvertently as he goes to nail Sid with a right hand in the corner. Or maybe it was on purpose, because Jeff then sends the ref face first into the middle turnbuckle.
Jeff takes his guitar from a Harris and comes up behind Sid, smashing it over Sid's head. Jeff calls Slick Johnson as a new referee, but Hogan isn't far behind. Jeff makes the cover, Slick counts to 2, but Hogan pulls him out, and even though Slick's hand hits the mat for three right before, the match continues, after Hogan lays out Slick. Hogan in now with right hands, sends Jeff off the ropes into a big boot. Hogan knocks the Harris Brothers off the apron before hitting the leg drop. As the ref comes to, Hogan pulls Sid on top and takes out the Harris' again and Sid retains in 7:39. Again, setting aside the unnecessary BS, this match was actually pretty good.
A wild Scott Steiner appears and smashes another guitar over Hogan's back, then throws the referee out. Harris brothers attack Hogan, before Sid comes back up and takes one out with a chokeslam. Jarrett and co make their way out as Flair appears out of nowhere with the strap, rips Hogan's shirt off as the ref calls for the bell.
Yapapi Strap Match: Hulk Hogan vs Ric Flair
Important to note that commentary tell us this is your traditional strap match, where you have to touch all four turnbuckles to win the match. Flair attaches the strap to Hogan's wrist before he starts to whip him with with it, then stomps away. Jimmy Hart is out now with Hogan's strap as Hogan pulls Ric out of the ring.
Hogan with right hands and starts to choke Ric with the strap. Flair with chops and Hogan corners Ric by the barricade. Ric face first off the barricade, chops and rigs by Hogan before going back to the ring. Hogan wraps the strap around Ric's throat before he goes back to whipping in the corner. Ric whipped to the opposite corner and Hogan follows with a clothesline, then Ric does his trademark flop to the mat.
Flair backs away to bait Hogan in, poking him in the eye. Flair wraps the strap to pull Hogan in closer, whips him and starts to choke Hogan now, then around the mouth of Hogan and pulling back. Hogan gets in a low blow with a back kick. Hogan gets his belt from Jimmy and starts to whip Flair with it, but Flair gets him in the corner with chops to no effect, Hogan coming out with a clothesline.
Hogan chokes Flair some more then another whip with his belt and Flair retreats out of the ring, Hogan pulls him back as he tries to leave and Hogan with more right hands, Flair face first off the barricade again before they go back in the ring. In the corner, Hogan with a 10 punch then bites the forehead, then another 10 punch. Flair retreats again.
Hogan pulls Flair back in by the strap and Flair begs, now busted open from something. Hogan drops him with a right hand before mounting for more right hands, opening the cut further. Flair begs in the corner before raking the eyes. Flair goes up top but Hogan cuts him off, throwing him back to the mat. Flair retreats again but Hogan follows with a clothesline to the floor. Jummy gets in soe whips of his own, then Hogan sends Ric to the barricade with right hands and chops, then Ric with some of his own. Flair tries to leave but Hogan follows, more right hands on the ramp. Lex comes out and nails Hogan over the head with a chair.
Hogan busted open now as Flair opens up with some fists to the cut, Hogan into the barricade now and Flair with more chops. More whips to the back of Hogan before Flair pulls him back to ringside. Hogan into the barricade again, more fists and chops by Flair and a low blow. Flair takes the strap off to chase Jimmy before putting it back on and they re-enter the ring.
Flair with more rapid fire punches to the open cut of Hogan, then more choking, but Jimmy in now. Flair decks him and chops him back down. Flair with a kick to the back of the knee of Hogan as Jimmy leaves, and Flair starts to touch the corners. He gets 3, but Hogan hangs onto the bottom rope to interrupt. Flair tries to pull him off with stomps but it's no use. Flair takes some brass knuckles from his boots and nails Hogan.
Let's throw the rules out now, as Flair covers Hogan, ref starts the count with no hesitation and Hogan powers out at 2. Commentary are just as confused and have no explanation as Hogan hulks up. You know how this goes by now, Hogan gets the big boot, then drags Flair around as he touches the turnbuckles. After number 3, Luger runs in, only to be hit with a big boot, he rolls out and Hogan hits a leg drop on Flair. Hogan covers Flair for the three in 14:29, and even though the bell has rung, he touches the 4th corner for the hell of it. This match had nothing exciting as far as action goes, not to mention the interference and the nonsensical finish that reminds me of Uncensored '96.
Flair rolls out and heads to the back with Luger as Hogan and Jimmy celebrate, and the show eventually fades out.
FINAL THOUGHTS
Wow, this show was a mess. With the exception of the main event, nothing went past 10 minutes, and really, it was the one match that shouldn't have gone that long. Opening Cruiserweight match was fun, and the two matches prior to the main event were alright, plus the Harlem Heat/Booker/Kidman match, but that's 4 out of 11 total matches that were redeemable on this show. With a run time of 2:34:15, we had a total 1:24:43 of bell to bell wrestling. Yikes.
Sid would hold the title for for about a month, until Bischoff and Russo made their return to WCW and rebooted the company, vacating all the titles. Jarrett would go on to win the title at Spring Stampede over DDP. Sid I think would enter a feud with Hogan. More on all this when I eventually cover WCW's last year in business.
Lodi off the ropes as he gets up into a scoop slam. Lane from behind, XS send Norman off the ropes who kicks Lane in the midsection, dropping him with a clothesline, slipping between Lodi's legs to tag in Demon. Right hands on Demon, Lodi with a drop toe hold as Demon tries to send him off the ropes and Lane tags in, leg drop to the back of the neck. I think a tag happens, but the camera is on Hancock while it happens. Back in the ring, Demon is whipped into the corner, Lodi leaps off of Lane into Demon and Lodi flies over the ropes to the floor. Lane with a suplex, hooks the leg but Demon kicks out.
Lodi tags in, they send Demon off the ropes and go for a double clothesline but they all go down for... reasons. Demon get the hot tag, Norman gets the advantage momentarily only to get pushed over Lane, allowing Lodi to hit a full nelson facebuster. He goes for the pin but Demon breaks it up. Demon goes after Lodi but Lane cuts him off, Lodi sends himself and Demon over the ropes. Norman sneaks up behind Lane and locks in the Norman Conquest (crossface chickenwing) and Lane taps out in 3:41. It was obvious they tried to get in as much stuff as they could in the little time they had, and it was just bland and dull.
XS go after Hancock, blaming her for the loss and take her away. Demon and Norman stop them up the aisle way and take Hancock back to the ring, Norman does his big wiggle and she spanks him, then the ref gets into it, before we go to the back.
Kidman, Booker and Torrie Wilson are backstage, Kidman apologizing for what happened on Thunder, that the stuff Stevie was saying may have got to him. Booker says to save his apology for when they're out there in the ring, and that if he's gonna be there, he needs Kidman there watching his back.
Cut to David Flair, Crowbar and Daffney somewhere else in the back, David and Crowbar wearing neck braces. David asks Daffney to stay in the back seeing as tonight's match is gonna be dangerous, and she promises she will, before they head off.
Back to the arena, commentary talk up The Wall as we go to footage of his destruction, being responsible for Crowbar and David's injuries, chokeslaming everyone through tables. Bigelow had to step in and that's how we got here.
Bam Bam Bigelow vs The Wall
Bigelow wastes not time with right hands as Wall enters the ring, more in the corner, Wall with some of his own, then kicks to the midsection. Bigelow with more rights, whipping Wall into the corner and nailing a splash, then goes to whip again, only to be pulled back into a clothesline. Wall with a clothesline as Bigelow slouches in the corner, then goes for another, but Bigelow nails a clothesline of his own.
Bigelow hits a scoop slam before going up top, nailing a headbutt, covers Wall but he kicks out. Bigelow seemingly goes for Greetings from Ashbury Park but Wall slips out, sending Bigelow off the ropes into a big boot. More right hands by Wall, Bigelow sent off the ropes and catches a high knee. Wall hooks the leg for a near fall.
Bigelow sent off the ropes again but Bigelow catches him with a spinning DDT, goes for the cover but Wall kicks out. Wall rakes the eyes with more right hands, before sending himself and Bigelow over the ropes. They fight their way up the aisle, sending each other into the guardrails before going beside the staging with an equipment table. Wall chokeslams Bigelow through the table, setting off smoke from the equipment and... the bell is rung? It's not even by countout, the ref followed them the whole way, so is it a DQ? Wikipedia lists this as a win for Bigelow by DQ, which seems to be on par with WCW's assbackward booking. Anyway, the match went for 3:35.
David Flair attacks Wall from behind followed by Crowbar, but Wall makes short work of them. EMT's are out with a stretcher for Bigelow as Wall and Crowbar are on the stage. They fight to the back I guess? Crowbar has climbed up the entrance set where there's a platform, but Wall catches Crowbar by the throat, right hands and chokeslams Crowbar through the stage below. Doctors now rush to Crowbar as Daffney screams nearby. I think the fans start chanting to jump as we go to replays. Commentary suggest Crowbar might be dead as we see Crowbar carted out, with several wrestlers by his side.
We cut to Gene who's with Brian Knobbs, who says Crowbar and Bigelow are two of the gutsiest guys he's ever seen. He's dedicating his Hardcore Title match to them before walking off.
WCW Hardcore Championship: 3 Count (Evan Karagias, Shannon Moore & Shane Helms) (c) vs Brian Knobbs
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: So I guess 3 Count are all the Hardcore Champions, after they piled on top of Knobbs to win the title a month ago. Evan thanks their fans for supporting the best looking Hardcore Champs in history. He says 3 Count's gonna be live at 5 all night in South Beach, and Knobbs interrupts before anything else goes on. Shane wearing a masquerade looking mask, Madden remarks it's to protect his broken nose. Commentary mention that this is a Gauntlet Match while Tony says it's hard to sit through this after what Wall just did. Knobbs runs backstage to pull out a wheelbarrow full of weapons, including a ladder and a trash can. He tosses some of them into the ring, Shane comes off the top with a mop and cracks Knobbs over the back with it to start this match.
Evan and Moore off the apron with trash can lids to the head, followed by a trash can shot before they re-enter the ring. Knobbs cracks Moore over the head with a trash can, then Evan, then a chair across the back of Shane. Evan gets him across the back with a mop, but he shrugs it off, tossing a trash can at him, then another across the back of Moore, then Shane, then the head of Evan. Knobbs shoves Moore's face into his armpit, then Evan, then Shane. Shane cracks a chair over Knobbs' head. Moore sets a ladder in the corner, Shane and Evan whip Knobbs face first into it. Moore sets the ladder up and Shane climbs up and nails a splash, then Evan climbs and hits a twisting splash, then Moore with a senton, but Knobbs rolls out of the way. Evan with a trash can to the back, but Knobbs grabs a fire extinguisher and sprays all three as they pose for the crowd.
Knobbs breaks a mop over Shane's back, sets a chair over his face and cracks a mop over it, Knobbs makes the cover and eliminates Shane. Knobbs breaks a mop over Evan's back, then whips Moore into the guard rail on the outside. Knobbs pulls out a table and sets it up before throwing Evan back in the ring. Broom to the back, then Knobbs powerbombs Evan over the ropes through the table. Knobbs makes the cover and eliminates him. Shane back now but gets whipped over the guardrail. Moore tries to get a chair shot in but Knobbs blocks and gets him in the head.
Moore rolled back in as Knobbs pulls out another table and into the ring. He slams the ladder on top of Moore before setting up the table and scoops Moore up, but Shane with a dropkick off the top rope, sending them tumbling over the table, Shannon covers and wins to retain...
Nope, Knobbs' foot was on the ropes, despite the fact this is a Hardcore Match, so the match continues. 3 Count celebrate prematurely as Knobbs grabs a trash can from behind, nailing the in the heads. Knobbs throws a ladder out onto Evan and Moore tries to just hand Knobbs the title, but Knobbs isn't having any of it. Knobbs goes up top with a trash can and nails a splash with the can underneath him, pins Moore and regains the title in 7:01. Well, this was a mess.
Knobbs leaves he ring as we go to replays, before cutting to Gene with the New Harlem Heat: Big T (formerly Ahmed Johnson), Stevie Ray and Kash, managed by J. Biggs. Ray says its about time they got the two pipsqueaks, Booker and Kidman, in the ring, and they're gonna make short order of them. He tells Kidman not to trust Booker. Big T says he doesn't have much to say, but tells Booker and Kidman that the heat is on.
Cut back to the limo we saw at the start of the show, no one has come out according to Tony. Then we cut o Vampiro somewhere in the back, who says he sees things every day that horrifies him, and when he sees bad things and bad people, it makes him think of things, and he gets ashamed, because he starts to think of really bad things and doing violent mean things. He talks about how Fit Finlay got in his face, saying he's got no respect or responsibility, and how he has to keep pushing buttons. He says he doesn't want to be a bad person. This is just a weird, rambling promo.
Booker & Billy Kidman (w/ Torrie Wilson) vs New Harlem Heat 2000 (Big T & Stevie Ray) (w/ J. Biggs & Cash)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: So, Booker has lost the T and his usual music because it belongs to Harlem Heat, so his music is more generic and he's just...well, Booker now. We still have no update on Bigelow, as we see footage from last week's Thunder, where Booker gets pissed at Kidman for not having his back. Later in the night, Booker would save Kidman from an attack by Dustin Rhodes. Harlem Heat of course come out to the classic music. Biggs joins commentary, who Madden claims to have grown up with.
Ray and Booker start things out, Ray right out of the gate with some right hands and kicks, knocking Booker to the mat, stomping away at him. Ray goes to send Booker off the ropes, but pulls back and nails a side kick. Booker with right hands now, Ray sent off the ropes into an elbow. Kidman tagged in, Ray sent off the ropes, Booker drops for Kidman to nail a dropkick.
Kidman sent off the ropes and tries a crossbody but Ray catches him and hits a powerslam, before tagging T in. Kidman takes him off his feet with a dropkick before tagging Booker in, tying T up in the ropes for a chop, sent off the ropes and ducks a clothesline for a side kick, then one for Ray as he tries to step in. Cash tries to enter but Booker nails the scissors kick through the ropes. Booker with a Russian leg sweep on T before tagging in Kidman who goes up top, but Ray hits a clothesline.
Ray with a right hand knocking Kidman to the mat and tags T back in, Kidman sent off the ropes into a pair of bicycle kicks. Ray back in, Kidman off the ropes again to a double gut punch and a pair of side kicks. Ray with the cover, but Torrie gets on the apron. Cash chokes and attacks Kidman while the ref deals with Torrie. Kidman brought to the outside, T climbs over the guardrail and flies over, for what's supposed to be a shoulder tackle but doesn't even hit him. Kidman tossed back in and Ray drops Kidman ribs first over the top rope, followed with another kick off the apron.
Cash rolls him back in and T is in now, camera cuts to Biggs and Madden, then cut back to a spinebuster on Kidman, T with the cover but Booker breaks it up. Ray in now, whipped into the corner into a clothesline, then the opposite corner, Ray goes for a splash but Kidman dodges, and a bulldog. Ray tags out and Kidman gets the hot tag, Booker with right hands, sent off the ropes and nails T with a Book End, cover but Ray breaks it up. Booker sent off the ropes and hits a Book End on Ray. T comes from behind, Booker sent off the ropes, ducks some clothesline but they catch him into a double spinebuster. T goes for the pin but Kidman flies in to break it up.
Ray tosses him out of the ring and follows, T stomping away at Booker. Kidamn knocks Cash into Ray. T goes for a suplex but Kidman hops over the ropes into a sunset flip, but can't pull T down for the pin. Booker nails the Harlem Side Kick to complete the pin and win the match in 6:59. Honestly not a bad match. A bit of a mess at points, but not bad.
Booker, Kidman and Torrie celebrate at ringside as Biggs and Ray argue with the ref, then go to replays. Then we go back to what happened to Bigelow and Crowbar earlier in the night, into our next match.
We get a short video package where Fit Finlay and Vampiro fight in various areas, Finlay making the challenge.
Falls Count Anywhere Match: Fit Finlay vs Vampiro
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: As Finlay makes his way out, we get an update on Crowbar and Bigelow, both suffering from severe concussions. Bigelow also has a dislocated shoulder, and Crowbar cracked several ribs and a severely bruised hip. Finlay rocking gray camo, both with casts on one of their hands.
Finlay wastes no time with a knee to the midsection, point of the elbow to the head and a clothesline. Kick to the back and an elbow drop, before a nerve pinch and raking at Vamp's face, then another elbow. Vamp sent off the ropes but Vamp nails a spinning heel kick. Vamp up top with another heel kick, cover and a 2 count.
Finlay's vest opened to allow Vamp a chop, headbutts and kicks against the ropes and clubs to the back. Finlay in the corner as Vamp lands right hands, Finlay whipped into the opposite corner as Vamp goes charging, but Finlay gets the boots up, sending Vamp face first into the turnbuckle, followed by a rolling senton.
Finlay heads out and grabs a chair, placing it on Vamp's face and throat but... the ref takes it away? Um, OK...? Finlay gets pissed and takes it back but Vamp kicks it back in his face, before tossing him out.
Vamp sends Finlay face first off the announce table before jamming his elbow in Finlay's face. Finlay hoists Vamp up and drop throat first on the guard rail. Now over by the aisle, Finlay gets whipped into the rail, Vamp charges but gets launched over to the floor. Through the crowd and up the steps, fighting their way through the crowd, slamming each other around until they find themselves to the men's room.
Vamp thrown into a stall, then the door is slammed into his neck and head, before dragging into another stall. Vamp throws a trash can into Finlay before climbing the top of the stall, launching off only for Finlay throw the trash can back into him, then again. Out of the bathroom now with a metal can off Vamp's head, in what looks to be a bar crowded with people. Cast off the head of Finlay as they fight out to the balcony.
Finlay with Vamp on his shoulders, seemingly to throw him off, but Vamp slips off, only to head back inside. Vamp thrown into a pillar , then right hands on Finlay but Vamp gets whipped into a wall, then into a back body drop to the floor. Finlay misses a punch and hits the pillar, then thrown into the pillar, and a fan topples over him. Vamp hits the Nail in the Coffin (Michinoku Driver) on the floor to win in 8:46. This started slow and just turned into a mess. Last few minutes could barely see anything, no lights, all the fans crowding. Could've been a fun match, but this is WCW so...
Vamp pulls himself up as the fans celebrate and he makes his escape and back out to the arena to celebrate among the fans.
Cut to backstage where the Harris Brothers are talking to Jarrett ahead of their title match, which is next. Then, to Gene who are with the tag champs, the Mamalukes: Big Vito, Johnny the Bull and... Disco Inferno? Gene mentions some unique stips before Disco interrupts, calling the Harris' jamokes and that they've treated the Mamalukes with no respect, so they'll have to beat it out of the Harris' tonight. Vito cuts in, mentions family values, no holds barred, no DQ, they're they champs they like having the gold around their waists, and that's how they're going home. Johnny says they're gonna break their thumbs before we go back to the arena.
No Disqualification Match for the WCW World Tag Team Championship: The Harris Brothers (Ron & Don) vs The Mamalukes (Big Vito & Johnny the Bull) (c) (w/ Disco Inferno)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: Harris Brothers come out to NWO music and in suits.
Vito and... one of the Harris' start out, as Disco joins commentary. Do we really need a guest commentator for every match? Harris gets Vito in the corner with rights, Vito fights out and off the ropes with a series of clotheslines, knocking the Harris out. Johnny tagged in and the Harris with some rights now, choking Johnny over the middle rope. Harris sent off the ropes and caught in a powerslam, Johnny with the cover but Harris kicks out.
Vito tagged in, Harris sent off the ropes, kick to the midsection, boot from Johnny off the ropes and Vito follows with a swinging neck breaker. Vito with the cover and a near fall. Harris with a low blow before tagging in the other Harris, and commentary spend more time arguing with Disco and Madden than telling us which Harris is which. Vito sent off the ropes into an elbow. Johnny pushed and goes after Harris only to be held back, going back onto the apron. Vito reverses a whip into the ropes and catches Harris with a hip toss, then a scoop slam, stomps and tags in Johnny.
Harris sent off the ropes and knocked down, Mamalukes stomp away, send Harris off the ropes again into a Brooklyn Bomb, just invented by Disco apparently, Johnny hooks the legs but Harris kicks out. Harris reverses a whip into the ropes and Harris #2 clubs Johnny from behind on the apron, Harris followed with a clothesline. Harris tags out and stomps away at Johnny before tossing him out. Vito goes after Harris while Harris #2 sends Johnny into the guardrail, then rolls him back in the ring. Johnny sent off the ropes and caught in a sidewalk slam, makes the cover ut Vito breaks it up.
Harris tags out and #2 kicks Johnny in the midsection. Johnny off the ropes with a spin kick. Harris shoves Vito off the ropes, who then slides in while the Harris' double team Johnny in the corner. Harris #2 hangs Johnny over the top rope, Harris steps on his head. Johnny tries to fight back but gets sent face first into the turnbuckle. Camera spends several moments on Disco before Harris whips Johnny off the ropes, ducks a clothesline and take each other down.
Johnny with the hot tag and he delivers some right hands and kicks, Johnny joins in while Vito gets a 10 punch in the corner, followed by a suplex. Vito goes up top and nails an elbow, hooks the leg but Harris kicks out. Johnny in and sends Harris off the ropes, into something like a Hart Attack, Johnny goes for the pin but Harris #2 breaks it up. Harris #2 tosses Vito out, Johnny sent off the ropes into a double flapjack, pin but Johnny kicks out. Johnny sent off the ropes again, into a pancake for a pin but Vito breaks it up.
Johnny and a Harris go to the outside as Vito goes for a sunset flip, but Harriis fights back with right hands. Disco runs in with one of the belts and nails Harris with it. Vito hooks the leg but Harris kicks out.
Harris #2 back in now, Vito goes for an Impaler DDT but gets clocked with the belt, then one for Disco and Johnny as they try to help. Vito off the ropes and caught for an H Bomb to win the titles in 8:47. Eh. Harris Brothers are pretty limited, so this wasn't all that great a match. Not to mention Disco started to get annoying.
Harris' celebrate and leave the ring as we go to replays, then we see the limo parked outside again.
We cut to Finlay in the back who's requested interview time. He says that he said all along he'd beat respect into Vamp, and that's what he did tonight. He admits the better man won, he took it to him, and lit a fire within Vamp. He tells Vamp to keep it burning and has earned his respect and that's all he's got to say. Short and simple.
Then to Gene, who's with Lex Luger, Ric Flair and Elizabeth. Lex hypes his match with Sting, calling him a coward, saying he'll beat Sting's brains in and knock some teeth down his throat, because he can do it, because he's the Total Package. Ric hypes up Lex and says Sting's going down, before going to Hogan, saying he's gonna bleed and sweat all night long.
Then a video package for our next match. Dustin has beat up Funk multiple times over the weeks, I guess continuing the Funk/Rhodes history.
Then we go to Gene again who's with Dustin, bullrope around his neck, and says tonight is Funk's retirement match (ha!). He says Funk won't get to watch, but he will let Funk watch Dustin beat the living hell out of him and split his head open with the cowbell, and make Funk admit that Dustin is the American Nightmare.
Texas Bullrope Match: Terry Funk vs Dustin Rhodes
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: Funk comes out with a chicken and mic and hand, calling Dustin a chicken. He says the only difference between Dustin and Dusty is that Dusty is much fatter, plus he has a surprise for Dustin, and out comes a man in a chicken suit from the crowd into the ring. Dustin chases the chicken man up the aisle and Terry lays out Dustin to... start the match? They haven't been tied together by the bullrope yet.
Lefts and rights by Terry before whipping Dustin into the guard rail, then goes to the ring. More left by Terry before he starts to whip Dustin with the bullrope. Oh, I guess it isn't THAT type of bull rope match. Terry takes Dustin to the corner for the weakest 10 punch I've ever seen, followed by a DDT. Terry goes for the cover but Dustin kicks out.
More lefts by Terry before sending Dustin face first into the turnbuckle, Dustin sent off the ropes into a clothesline. Terry with the cowbell now and nails Dustin, covers but Dustin grabs the bottom rope. Dustin with a low blow from behind as Terry argues with the referee, probably because there shouldn't be a rope break in this match. Dustin now with a right hand before sending Terry face first into the corner, then wraps the bullrope around him, throwing him to the middle and pulling back for a whiplash. Now cowbell shots to the head and face as Terry hangs on between the ropes before dropping to the outside.
Dustin follows out and wraps the rope around Terry again for another whiplash, followed by some right hands. Back in the ring, Dustin hooks the bullrope to Terry's wrist, then his own. Oh so it is that kind of bull rope match? DDT by Dustin, cover and a kick out. Dustin lifts for a back body drop only to throw Terry forward onto his back, another cover and another kick out.
Dustin with rights in the corner, positions the cowbell under Terry's face as he hooks his head, delivering a bulldog out of the corner onto the cowbell. Dustin with another cover but Terry kicks out. Dustin with more right hands but the chicken is back out, only for Dustin to nail him with the rope and bell, sending him out of the ring. Dustin sends the chicken into the guard rail before Dustin nails Terry with the bell again. Dustin goes to climb back in over the ropes but Terry crotches him and makes him ride the rope.
Both back in now, Terry with a low blow using the cowbell, then stomping away at his head. Terry gets a mic from ringside and changes the rules to an I Quit match. The ref tries to tell him otherwise, but Funk nails him in the head with the cowbell instead, then throws him out of the ring. Funk nails Dustin with the bell now repeatedly and tells Dustin to quit as he does, and eventually he does say I Quit, but the match is still officially a Bullrope Match, so the match continues.
Funk argues with the ref again and Funk threatens him, but Dustin nails him with the cowbell again off the distraction, then a few more times for good measure. Dustin nails a piledriver onto the cowbell to get the win in 9:03. This wasn't a great match, slow and plodding. Not to mention I think Funk is supposed to be the face in this, and yet he acted more like a heel. Finish was a bit over booked too.
Dustin gets the mic again and says he;s gonna send Funk back to Texas in a box, before he starts nailing him with the cowbell some more. Funk fights back with some rights and Dustin is forced to retreat as Funk swings the rope around.
They decided to plug some Outsiders T-shirts for some reason before going to Gene in the back, who's with Sid ahead of his title defense tonight. Gene says he's concerned about what Jarrett might have in store tonight. Sid says it's not his first time dealing with Jeff, saying he's not gonna let it bother him, he's going to go on to bigger and better things. He finishes saying he's gotta watch his own back before walking off. I think I missed parts but he speaks in this quieted tone it's hard to tell what he's saying.
Gene sends us to a video package of the history between Luger and Sting, from Luger breaking Sting's arm in a chair with the help of Liz, mocking Sting in his facepaint and wig, then Luger breaking more arms. Sting returns to to take out Luger and Ric, Sting challenging Luger for tonight.
Lumberjack Cast Match: Sting vs Lex Luger (w/ Elizabeth) (Lumberjacks: Jimmy Hart, Curt Henning, Doug Dillinger, Fit Finlay, Brian Knobbs, Vampiro)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: The lumberjacks tonight are the victims of Luger, all sporting a cast on their arm. I guess Luger is going by The Total Package at this point. After posing for a bit, Luger gets on the mic and says that's why he's the Total Package. He says he wants to diffuse the situation before the match starts, apologizing to the lumberjacks for what he did. He says he's also the most intelligent wrestler, and brings out some backup lumberjacks, adding Hugh Morris, Harlem Heat 2000 and The Harris Brothers, all sporting their own casts.
Luger wastes no time attacking Sting before he can get his jacket off as the bell is rung, Sting face first into the turnbuckle, then Luger, Sting with kicks to the midsection and a right to knock Lex to the mat. Lex rolls out to his lumberjack before he rolls back in, Sting stomps away. Sting with an atomic drop then some right hands, more stomps as Lex tries to roll out. Crowd is finally into the show after being dead, Sting hits a scoop slam then an elbow, cover and a near fall.
Bell clap on Luger before he gets tossed out to Sting's lumberjacks who... stomp on him rather than use the casts. Then Luger's lumberjacks get involved and roll him back in. Sting back on the offensive with right hands. Luger begging for mercy and suckers Sting in, pulling him out through the ropes toward his lumberjacks, who do the smart thing and nail Sting with their casts before tossing him back in the ring.
Tank Abbott decides to walk to the ring now sans cast and he knocks Doug to the floor, then... leaves. Um, OK. Lumberjack starts to fight up the aisle and to the back as Luger applies a headlock. Why? Oh wait, Vampiro's still here. Now Flair is out with Elizabeth, chair in hand, and he and Vamp fight it out. Sting now with clotheslines and a bulldog as Flair sends Vamp into the guard rail. Flair in now with chops in the corner, Sting fights back and sends Rick into the opposite corner for a Stinger Splash, then a hip toss and a dropkick before Luger attacks from behind.
Sting reverses a whip into the corner and nails a Stinger Splash on Luger, but while the ref argues with Flair, Liz nails Sting in the back with a bat from the apron. Vamp takes the bat as Jimmy Hart takes her to the back, with Hulk's belt in his hand for some reason. Luger goes for the cover but Sting kicks out. Luger gets Sting up for the Torture Rack, but Vamp comes in and nails Luger for behind, allowing Sting to nail the Scorpion Deathdrop for the win in 7:01. Honestly if you take the unnecessary lumberjacks out of this, this isn't a bad match. Didn't go too long, wasn't too short. I'll give this one a pass.
Sting poses in the corner and embrace with Vamp, the brothers in paint as Tenay remarks. We go to the back where Gene is with Tank, who asks about his involvement in the match. Tank says he did it because he can, and I think calls Gene "Gino" in the process. Then says something about Doug taking his money. I don't know, I didn't understand this one bit.
We go to a video package for our world title match, showing Jarrett smashing guitars over Sid's head and getting two victories over him in the weeks leading up. Jeff has gotten the upper hand more often than not.
We see the limo again outside and the driver opens the door, only for the feed to cut to Jarrett on his way to the ring. Tenay mentions a change to the format, as Hogan/Flair was supposed to be next. A crew member is seen telling Sid his match is next in his locker room and he rushes out. We go back to the arena and to Michael Buffer for the introductions.
WCW World Heavyweight Championship: Sid Vicious (c) vs Jeff Jarrett (WCW United States Heavyweight Champion)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: Probably sign of the night right here.
Jeff tries for a right hand right away but Sid ducks and lands some of his own, sending Jarrett off the ropes and a clothesline. Jeff in the corner for some punches to the midsection, sent to the opposite corner but catches himself, only for Sid to land another right hand. Sid with a 10 punch, Jarret sent off the ropes and caught for a chokeslam but Jeff pokes Sid in the eye, only to be clotheslined over the ropes to the floor.
Sid follows and scoop slams Jeff onto the announce table before pouring water on Jeff, then follows with a double axe handle off the table. Sid throws Jeff over the barricade and they fight through the crowd, Jeff taking all the offense. Tony is confused because as to why there's no count out right now, even though it's Uncensored as he'd remark. They eventually fight to the entrance and Sid whips Jeff into the guard rail, starts to choke him but the Harris Brothers attack from behind.
Back in the ring they double team with right hands, and Jarrett is seen grabbing a chair, only for the referee to try and take it, only for Jeff to swing him around and throw him. Harris' leave after laying into Sid, Jeff re-enters and poses in the corner before stomping away at Sid. Right hands whaling away at Sid, Sid sent off the ropes and Jeff swings onto his back to apply a sleeper hold. Sid tries to fight out but eventually drops to his knees and goes limp, ref raises his arm twice, but Sid comes back to life on the third. Sid pulls himself back and elbows out of the hold, but Jeff thumbs to the eye.
Sid reverses a whip into the corner and charges, but Jeff gets a boot up, off the second rope with a double axe handle, but Sid nails a low blow. Jeff comes off the ropes but gets caught with a right from Sid, tries again and gets caught again. Sid sends Jeff off the ropes into a big boot. Sid argues with a Harris Brother only for Jeff to attack from behind. The other Harris climbs onto the apron with belt in hand as Jeff tries to send Sid face first into it, only to get reversed. Jeff hits the title, Sid hooks the legs but Jeff kicks out.
Jeff sent off the ropes and caught for a chokeslam, but low blows Sid as he's lifted up. Jeff nails the ref with an elbow inadvertently as he goes to nail Sid with a right hand in the corner. Or maybe it was on purpose, because Jeff then sends the ref face first into the middle turnbuckle.
Jeff takes his guitar from a Harris and comes up behind Sid, smashing it over Sid's head. Jeff calls Slick Johnson as a new referee, but Hogan isn't far behind. Jeff makes the cover, Slick counts to 2, but Hogan pulls him out, and even though Slick's hand hits the mat for three right before, the match continues, after Hogan lays out Slick. Hogan in now with right hands, sends Jeff off the ropes into a big boot. Hogan knocks the Harris Brothers off the apron before hitting the leg drop. As the ref comes to, Hogan pulls Sid on top and takes out the Harris' again and Sid retains in 7:39. Again, setting aside the unnecessary BS, this match was actually pretty good.
A wild Scott Steiner appears and smashes another guitar over Hogan's back, then throws the referee out. Harris brothers attack Hogan, before Sid comes back up and takes one out with a chokeslam. Jarrett and co make their way out as Flair appears out of nowhere with the strap, rips Hogan's shirt off as the ref calls for the bell.
Yapapi Strap Match: Hulk Hogan vs Ric Flair
Important to note that commentary tell us this is your traditional strap match, where you have to touch all four turnbuckles to win the match. Flair attaches the strap to Hogan's wrist before he starts to whip him with with it, then stomps away. Jimmy Hart is out now with Hogan's strap as Hogan pulls Ric out of the ring.
Hogan with right hands and starts to choke Ric with the strap. Flair with chops and Hogan corners Ric by the barricade. Ric face first off the barricade, chops and rigs by Hogan before going back to the ring. Hogan wraps the strap around Ric's throat before he goes back to whipping in the corner. Ric whipped to the opposite corner and Hogan follows with a clothesline, then Ric does his trademark flop to the mat.
Flair backs away to bait Hogan in, poking him in the eye. Flair wraps the strap to pull Hogan in closer, whips him and starts to choke Hogan now, then around the mouth of Hogan and pulling back. Hogan gets in a low blow with a back kick. Hogan gets his belt from Jimmy and starts to whip Flair with it, but Flair gets him in the corner with chops to no effect, Hogan coming out with a clothesline.
Hogan chokes Flair some more then another whip with his belt and Flair retreats out of the ring, Hogan pulls him back as he tries to leave and Hogan with more right hands, Flair face first off the barricade again before they go back in the ring. In the corner, Hogan with a 10 punch then bites the forehead, then another 10 punch. Flair retreats again.
Hogan pulls Flair back in by the strap and Flair begs, now busted open from something. Hogan drops him with a right hand before mounting for more right hands, opening the cut further. Flair begs in the corner before raking the eyes. Flair goes up top but Hogan cuts him off, throwing him back to the mat. Flair retreats again but Hogan follows with a clothesline to the floor. Jummy gets in soe whips of his own, then Hogan sends Ric to the barricade with right hands and chops, then Ric with some of his own. Flair tries to leave but Hogan follows, more right hands on the ramp. Lex comes out and nails Hogan over the head with a chair.
Hogan busted open now as Flair opens up with some fists to the cut, Hogan into the barricade now and Flair with more chops. More whips to the back of Hogan before Flair pulls him back to ringside. Hogan into the barricade again, more fists and chops by Flair and a low blow. Flair takes the strap off to chase Jimmy before putting it back on and they re-enter the ring.
Flair with more rapid fire punches to the open cut of Hogan, then more choking, but Jimmy in now. Flair decks him and chops him back down. Flair with a kick to the back of the knee of Hogan as Jimmy leaves, and Flair starts to touch the corners. He gets 3, but Hogan hangs onto the bottom rope to interrupt. Flair tries to pull him off with stomps but it's no use. Flair takes some brass knuckles from his boots and nails Hogan.
Let's throw the rules out now, as Flair covers Hogan, ref starts the count with no hesitation and Hogan powers out at 2. Commentary are just as confused and have no explanation as Hogan hulks up. You know how this goes by now, Hogan gets the big boot, then drags Flair around as he touches the turnbuckles. After number 3, Luger runs in, only to be hit with a big boot, he rolls out and Hogan hits a leg drop on Flair. Hogan covers Flair for the three in 14:29, and even though the bell has rung, he touches the 4th corner for the hell of it. This match had nothing exciting as far as action goes, not to mention the interference and the nonsensical finish that reminds me of Uncensored '96.
Flair rolls out and heads to the back with Luger as Hogan and Jimmy celebrate, and the show eventually fades out.
FINAL THOUGHTS
Wow, this show was a mess. With the exception of the main event, nothing went past 10 minutes, and really, it was the one match that shouldn't have gone that long. Opening Cruiserweight match was fun, and the two matches prior to the main event were alright, plus the Harlem Heat/Booker/Kidman match, but that's 4 out of 11 total matches that were redeemable on this show. With a run time of 2:34:15, we had a total 1:24:43 of bell to bell wrestling. Yikes.
Sid would hold the title for for about a month, until Bischoff and Russo made their return to WCW and rebooted the company, vacating all the titles. Jarrett would go on to win the title at Spring Stampede over DDP. Sid I think would enter a feud with Hogan. More on all this when I eventually cover WCW's last year in business.
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